Girl Power

There was a time, not too long ago, when the life of a teenage girl was nothing more than an ‘extension’ of everyone else around her. Not quite a woman, girls in their teens were constantly benched as extras, whose dreams and desires did not count in the real world. Maggie Tiojakin reports on how present-day young women are transforming themselves into the women of tomorrow.

Girls, girls, girls. They are out and about, seemingly everywhere, sometimes alone but most often in packs that crowd the malls and recreational hangouts. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. No longer confined to the limited space allotted for them, adolescent girls are now reaching out to create their own communities, redefining pop culture and kicking down the doors to get their share of opportunities.

Women in their late 20s and early 30s stare in awe, sometimes in shock, because they can’t remember a time when they were allowed to do the things these girls are now doing, with the kind of freedom previously reserved only for adults.

Suddenly, young women have choices. And freedom. It has come with the changing times, the shrinking of the world with the advent of the cyberage and the greater knowledge available.

“You have to remember that my generation didn’t have the privilege of Googling Britney Spears on the Internet,” says Jessica Huwae, a writer and editor of Media Perempuan, an online division of Media Indonesia, who also served as the managing editor of SPICE! magazine for more than three years.

“Ten years ago, our reading materials were very limited and what we did have didn’t say much. Today, you open a girl’s magazine and you catch the words ‘sex’, ‘menstruation’, ‘self-image’ … so, you go, ‘Whoa!’ And, I think, we owe it to the Internet.”

Ah, the Internet. Who could forget the most groundbreaking invention of the 20^th century, which forever changed the way information is created and distributed?

Irene, a 16-year-old high school student, says the Internet has helped her gain a better understanding of herself and the world around her.

“There are things my parents don’t want me to know, because they think I’m too young and gullible,” she says in the library at her North Jakarta school. “When I go online, I look up different sites and blogs created by other teenagers who talk about first-time sexual encounters, teen pregnancies, mood swings, etc. Why can’t I know these things? How can I find answers if I can’t ask the questions?”

Questions are important, yes. Child-psychologist Endang Kaliawan, who worked as a counselor at Don Bosco high school before opening her own practice in Rawamangun, East Jakarta, says teenagers in general are reluctant to address the issues of puberty with adults. With girls, she says, it’s like pulling teeth.

“Teenagers aren’t always responsive to adults, because they feel that adults are always on to them, watching their every move and just waiting to pounce on them,” Endang explains. “In the history of psychology, the bridge between adults and teenagers has been burned and rebuilt to accommodate the demands. In the last four or five years, for instance, we have been dealing with depression, identity-crisis and sexuality in ways that in the early 1990s were practically unheard of.”

This is why the Internet matters. According to Jessica Huwae, it gives people an outlet to speak their minds and raise questions they feel embarrassed to ask in person. While working at SPICE!, she made it a point to constantly interact with her teen readers through online forums. They would suggest to her what they wanted to know about and her job was to bring that up in editorial meetings.

“Compared to how it was during my teenage years, today’s teenagers are far more active in their effort to grasp the concept of being a teenager,” Jessica says. “Girls, in particular, because suddenly they find themselves on an equal footing with the opposite sex.”

Not so much, argues Pitta Sekar. The junior features editor at Herworld magazine, Pitta doesn’t see a huge gap between girls of her generation and the generation of her kid sister.

“Girls today are more daring, I admit,” Pitta says. “Yet, the way I see it, high school is still a place where they are discriminated against compared to the boys.”

Looking back, she remembers treatment from her high school teachers that she considered “extremely sexist.”

“In high school, you were regarded as a cool person if you broke a rule or two. Jumping over the fence, climbing out of your classroom windows, cutting classes, smoking cigarettes — they were all things that would put you on the social map immediately,” Pitta says.

“When boys were caught doing those things, they got reprimanded for a minute and that was it. However, when girls were caught doing the same things, we got an hour’s worth of lecture about what it means to be a girl, why we weren’t supposed to do the things we did, and how those things would make us look bad.”

Pitta believes the approach has not changed.

Kiki is a 17-year-old girl who serves on the Student Council at Bunda Hati Kudus high school. Last year, she was chosen to represent her school in a regional scientific competition held by the Education Ministry. As someone who champions female rights, she feels lucky to have grown up in a time when girls are embarking on a positive journey filled with achievements and limitless possibilities.

Ironically, she doesn’t think the school’s rules and regulations imposed on her gender are sexist in any way.

“Some teachers may prefer dealing with boys than girls, or vice versa. It’s normal,” says Kiki, when interviewed at her home in Tanjung Duren, West Jakarta. “When my teachers say, ‘Girls are not supposed to do this and that’, I don’t think of it as discriminatory, and I take it as a general warning -- which is what it really is. Boys abuse their rights about certain things, but girls are the same. We can pretend to have PMS and be excused from our classes. Do we abuse that? Absolutely.”

Nevertheless, Kiki professes a problem when it comes to student politics. Electing a female as president of the Student Council is not a rarity nowadays, she says, but whether or not the female can garner the respect of male members of the council is another thing.

“The conflict, in my opinion, is more about who’s on top of who,” Kiki says. “Boys aren’t keen on taking orders from girls, because they have this macho thing going on. Girls, in return, aren’t comfortable being the ones who tell them to do stuff. In an organization, the dynamic is very different from what you see in a regular classroom. When we’re in a classroom, boys and girls treat each other with equal respect. In a structured organization, if you’re a girl, you’re bound to hit a few walls.”

Walls that many hope are in the process of being torn down. Where in the past, girls between the ages of 13 and 18 could only hope to make themselves noticed, today they are drawing the attention of major media and marketing directors.

Kotex launched its “Be You” campaign in April, 2008. The stated goal of the campaign is to empower teenage girls to create a new self-image, wherein they may discover “their own strength and unique potentials.” The campaign even has its own ambassador, teen soap star Dinna Olivia.

“Adolescence is a tough period, especially for girls,” says Andy Iskandar, the marketing manager of feminine care at Kimberly-Clark Indonesia, the producer of the feminine hygiene product Kotex. “Some girls are afraid that if they excel at something, then they will be stigmatized as an overachiever or someone who doesn’t know their place in life.”

Through its “Be You” campaign, Kotex hopes to do what once seemed impossible: balancing the scales between boys and girls.

There is a seemingly endless string of competitions in search of teenage girl icons, as hundreds and thousands of would-be icons prepare themselves for the time of their lives. Now at center stage and warming up to the spotlight, young girls are quickly morphing into the ideal women of the future—confident, smart, uninhibited.

Girls will be girls, but there is still the old drag of doing the right – read ‘conventional’ – thing and having their own family.

“I don’t want to get married young,” high school student Irene says firmly. “Sure, I want the dream wedding. But, before that happens, I want the dream job.”

“Girl power, for me, means independence,” Jessica Huwae says. “It’s the ability to express your true self. It’s not a declaration of war against the boys; it’s simply a statement of freedom. We’re here, we’re doing this and the sky is the limit.”

Or, as they say: You go, girl!

GIRL TALK

It started in the 1990s, a movement that was coined by its pioneers in the West as grrrrl power, igniting a rainstorm of approval from teenage girls who were finally getting the recognition they felt they deserved. From clothing lines to candy bars to Hollywood, it seems now everyone is trying to appeal to the teen girl crowd. While some fail, others have made millions. Slogans like “Do-It-Yourself” and “I’m Just a Girl: Strong, Smart, and Sexy” have become life-saving mottoes that have helped young girls define their independence.

Let’s hear what some girls have to say about ‘Girl Power’ in their own words:

“Girl Power means that you have to be tough, even if you’re a girl. Don’t whine, or cry at the slightest occurrence of trouble — just try and deal with your life’s issues as best as you can. I’m not one of those girlie girls who spend all their time trying to get the attention of boys. I think that’s weak. When I hang out, I like to do sporty things — get the energy out, you know? You won’t see me cry like a baby whenever I skin my knees; instead, I get up and get moving. Now, that’s tough.” – Allysa, 16, captain of her high school basketball team.

“I don’t know, I never think about it that much. I guess if I had to define Girl Power, I’d say it’s something we all have inside us, girls I mean. We don’t feel intimidated by the opposite sex and we can stand up for ourselves. I really believe that when you achieve certain things in your life, then you’re really powerful. There aren’t a lot of girls who pay attention to academic achievement, because they think it’s lame. For me, if you’re smart and have the grades to prove it, that’s the power right there. What good is it to be cool and beautiful if you haven’t got the brains?” – Mimi, 17, student council vice president.

“Let’s see, what does Girl Power mean to me? Well, I come from a family of women —except my dad — which is to say that I have three sisters who, I think, possess the kind of power you’re talking about. I suppose when I grow up, I want to be like all my sisters —two of them are married, with children, but they also have their own businesses. I don’t think having Girl Power means you have to neglect your duties as a girl, or a woman. I mean, washing dishes or cleaning up the table, for example, that’s a girl’s job. Girl Power means you shouldn’t limit yourself to only what you are supposed to do. You have to be able to dream the big dreams.” – Lulu, 15, a Gading Model finalist.

“No doubt about it, Girl Power means self-expression. Whoever you are, wherever you are … express yourself. Most girls just want to follow the crowd, but it’s the girls who go against the grain whom I think really understand the meaning of Girl Power. Smart is attractive, being active in sports is attractive, beauty is attractive — still, if you can’t express yourself, if your biggest goal in life is to do what everyone else is doing … then you’re a nobody. You haven’t got an ounce of power in you. You can say Girl Power is lost on you.” – Anindita, 19, university first-year student.

“Girl Power … is being smart, confident and knowing when to grab your opportunities. Excel in school, make your parents proud, don’t be afraid of achieving your goals. Fashion is also important, in that you should appear elegant and classy. What you wear reveals who you are inside, so if you’re a slob … you need to get your act together. Girl Power is all about making a statement, and you can’t make a statement if you’re stupid and dirty.” – Ilsa, 16, Wajah Gadis 2007 finalist.

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