By The Way: The day my 2-year-old faced oppression

Sun, 10/05/2008 10:42 AM  |  Headlines

When my husband and I decided to have kids, we agreed that we would try to protect our children from the mall culture. We both love the outdoors and have very strong feelings about it.

It is our dream and wish that our children will also develop the same appreciation for nature.

It hasn't been easy though; Especially in Jakarta. One of our favorite places to spend the weekend is Monas park. This is the place where we taught our kids how to fly kites and, on one occasion, how to stand up for themselves (the latter was unplanned).

It all happened one Saturday afternoon. The kids were running around flying kites when a car sped into the park and skidded to a halt centimeters from our two-year-old son. My son stopped in his tracks, petrified.

My husband picked up our son and confronted the driver, who had by this point disembarked from his would-be instrument of death.

"What were you thinking?" my husband said, "You almost hit my son."

This quite natural response was met not with an apology but rather with an equal tone of anger, "I am a commander in this park ... I can drive my car anywhere and anyway I want. Monas is mine!"

Now, this blew my mind. First, as a commander in the park, if anything, I would have expected him to uphold the park's regulations and to assume responsibility for the safety and welfare of the park's visitors. Second, Monas is a public park, it does not belong to any one person.

I think we can all agree that Jakarta is a city that has too few public parks and areas, and it is not a comforting thought that its residents are not willing to share the precious space that is available.

Another amazing thing that I realized was that of the many people that witnessed the incident, only one man approached us to offer his services as a witness in the event that we would file a formal complaint. The rest merely chose to pretend that nothing had happened.

My son is all right now. He was slightly in shock but has since recovered. But I have not. Is this really what our society is turning into? A "me" society ... A corrupt society (I am the commander, so I can do whatever I want), and a society that is not willing to stand up for anything. This damaging philosophy will cripple our right as citizens to assume our freedom: The one in power will surely win, so it's better to just accept it and move on.

Needless to say, on the way home, my husband explained to my children the importance of standing up for themselves no matter who they were faced with. The truth is the truth.

Whatever the outcome, my children should never lack the courage to stand up for themselves and what they believe in.

As for my reaction, I have decided to act in my own way -- by throwing my disillusionment into the public sphere. Meet us at the mall next week and tell us what you think.

-- Dian Estey

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