Have you ever noticed how old timers manage to enjoy themselves? I joined a group of seniors on a recent trip to Ocean Park at Ancol because I was curious to see how the park had changed since my last visit more than 10 years ago, and I got a glimpse into how some seniors experience life.
We started out quite early on a Friday from a neighborhood a good two-hour drive from Ancol. As the pensioners belong to a religious organization, they insisted their church leader come on the trip as well. The women outnumbered the men - who seemed to have lost their vocal chords - and sang hymns all the way to Ancol.
I guessed that most of them were in their 60s, and I was struck by how easily pleased they were. Take this group for instance: They were clearly excited about the trip - a simple bus trip to Ancol, for heaven's sake, not Disneyland in the States.
Their eyes shone brightly and happy smiles lit up their faces. Why? Because it was something they don't do very often - certainly a change from the pleasant comfort of church-going and all it entails.
From my perspective, sometimes it seems they should have more to look forward to than getting dressed up on Sundays and talking about such issues as overpriced plants that have to be carefully tended and locked safely away at night.
They had prepared carefully for the outing too, bringing great tote bags full of food with enough homemade dishes to feed several such groups (we were to bring our own lunch boxes - these seniors do not frequent posh restaurants where prices start at Rp 12,000 for water).
Among the attractions at Ocean Park is a underwater tunnel, which I wanted to walk through, but the others were not so keen.
"What if all that water were to suddenly break through and sweep you away ." one of the women mused. I was startled by the notion, which had never entered my mind.
"Yes, so many natural disasters seem to happen in Indonesia," another woman added. "Think of Situ Gintung: Who'd have thought all that water in the lake would inundate people living there when they were sleeping?"
"It really is worth a look though," I said. "It would give you the chance to see a grown shark at close quarters as it swims overhead."
More people joined our table, babbling contentedly; amid the chatter, I overheard some words spoken by a man in the group.
"I told my family that should I contract a terminal illness they should not hesitate to put me down. Arsenic is the best way," he said with such conviction you could not consider doubting his words.
My first unasked question was how he knew that for sure; but then another one occurred to me: Is such hopelessness all we can look forward to when old age arrives?
Involuntarily I shook my head. The movement caught the attention of the speaker, who said with a smile, "You don't approve, I see. And yet it is the most practical decision as it would unburdening members of the family.
"Besides," he went on, "nowhere in the Bible is written that you may not do that. Rather, Christ proclaimed that we should apply our intelligence and that is what my intelligence tells me to do when treatment becomes out of the question."
"It seems such a hopeless decision," I countered. "Where there is hope, there is life."
I lost interest in conversation after that. The thought that life could be snuffed out at will just depressed me no end.
Is this how we end up - looking to the end, finding solace only in the church and church groups? I don't think it boring so much as sad. How much could people's twilight years be enriched if they could develop a love for reading good books, beyond the Bible? If they could learn to welcome new experiences, rather than shy away from them? For so many people, 50 is the milestone when they start to say "I am getting old", when they start to think about dying. Merry making is no more for us, they reason, we should prepare for the afterlife - forgetting the religious promise of life everlasting.
But life doesn't end just because we turn 50. Or 60. Or even 70. It's not over until it's over. Old timers - or any of us - should be encouraged to keep interested and engaged in life, to keep learning and growing and embracing new experiences, to make the most of every moment - even when there don't seem to be many moments left.
- Claudine Frederik
