But did you know that the song wasn’t originally intended for Rihanna?

In an interview in the talk show “Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen,” R&B icon Mary J. Blige confirmed talks that the “Umbrella” songwriters once offered her the demo. However, nothing came out of it, because of Mary’s obligations to the Grammy Awards that year.

“It was during a big Grammy time for me. I was nominated for eight awards and I was trying to get myself together for that. And during that time, that’s when ‘Umbrella’ came to me and I couldn’t do anything with it because I was so busy with my own life,” recalled Mary, who rose to fame in the early 1990s, and has since sold 80 million records and collected multiple recognitions.

Besides, Mary wasn’t about to embark on a new album cycle anyway. “You know what? It doesn’t even sound like me anyway,” the 49-year-old singer-songwriter and actress said of “Umbrella,” which was also reportedly offered to Britney Spears’ camp.

“Umbrella” ended up topping various charts all over the world. It earned multiple platinum certifications and sold 6.6 million copies. But no regrets, Mary said, “because everything about that song was so tailor-made for Rihanna, and nothing about that song was Mary J. Blige.”

Meanwhile, like many music artists today, Mary, who’s behind the R&B classics “Family Affair” and “Be Without You,” has hit the pause button and is doing a bit of self-reflection amid the COVID-19 pandemic.

“I’m going to take away real appreciation of this me-time… I was already liking me, and now I have grown deeper in love with myself because I love my own company. I don’t think any of us realized how fast we had been moving,” she said in an interview in the latest issue of Health, an American wellness magazine.

The silence, Mary realized, has helped her listen more intently to what’s going on around her and, more importantly, to herself.

“When you’re by yourself, you’re either going to be your own best friend and be honest with yourself. Or you’re going to be your own worst enemy and deceive yourself,” she said. “It has been so clear to me that I’m my best friend.”

With the uncertainties, anxieties and stresses brought about by the pandemic, keeping one’s mental health in check is now needed more than ever. Mary turns to prayer and meditation to help keep herself grounded; she focuses on the positive, she added, and shuns lies and negativity.

“Every time a negative thought comes, I push it down. I’m like, ‘That’s a lie. I rebut and don’t receive that.’ It’s a practice and you have to do it all day, because negative thoughts come,” she said. “If you’re not sleeping, they’re coming every second of the day. It’s a constant job.”

Self-love is just as important. But it was something Mary had to learn the hard way—a process that took time. “It’s the hardest thing to feel because we live in a world where everybody is hurting,” she pointed out. “Until you get satisfied with who you are, other people won’t ever be satisfied. That’s the growing process.”

“That’s learning how to love yourself and say, ‘You know what? I love you, Mary. I love you, Beautiful. I love you, Gorgeous. I love you, Smart Woman. I love you, Talented Woman. That’s a practice I do every single day,” Mary said.

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