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Pre-marital sex is a fact of life, teens say
Scores of Jakarta’s youth have adopted a more liberal view of pre-marital sex, confirming findings by the National Family Planning Agency (BKKBN) that teenagers in the city were sexually active
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cores of Jakarta’s youth have adopted a more liberal view of pre-marital sex, confirming findings by the National Family Planning Agency (BKKBN) that teenagers in the city were sexually active.
Some of the teenagers interviewed by The Jakarta Post on Tuesday said they were not concerned about engaging in a pre-marital sexual intercourse and had lost their virginity early in their teens.
“I believe it is up to every individual to decide whether they should stay virgin until they get married.
Being a virgin has nothing to do with morality,” 20-year-old university student Rara (not her real name) told the Post in Central Jakarta.
But for teens, sexual intercourse can be complicated. “Sometimes a person loses their virginity out of love. For others, it’s about money. It’s a personal choice and society should not make judgments based on this,” she said.
A friend of Rara, Febri took a different path.
She has chosen abstinence and would only engage in sexual intercourse after getting married. Despite her stance, she said, she would respect the decision made by her peers about being sexually active.
“I will not pass moral judgments about people who engage in sexual intercourse early,” she told the Post.
For some high school students, virginity is not a big deal.
Dimas Hidayat Lubis, a 15-year-old student from a state vocational school in South Jakarta, said it was a personal choice. “I think it is important to stay a virgin until you are married. But everyone has the freedom to choose,” he said.
Stacy Louise, a university student in South Jakarta, said putting a premium on virginity was the hallmark of a conservative society. “Society sets standards, but it should not be used to measure people’s morality,” she said.
Virginity is a malleable concept, she said. “One’s virginity can be lost not only through consensual sexual intercourse, but also through accident or rape.”
Late last week, BKKBN head Sugiri Syarif said more than half the teenagers in Jakarta had engaged in pre-marital sexual intercourse.
He put the figure for Jakarta at 51 out of every 100 teenagers.
The figure for Jakarta was lower than in other cities, such as Surabaya (54 percent) and Medan (52 percent). Teenagers accounted for 800,000 of the 2.4 million abortions conducted in Indonesia every year, according to the survey.
While the majority of teenagers may not see virginity as a serious issue, society in general seems to be fixated by it.
There has never been a short supply of clinics in the capital offering hymen reconstruction surgery. In South Jakarta, such clinics can easily be found in Tebet and Kalibata.
Having the procedure done costs between Rp 4 million (US$440) and Rp 6 million.
A recent sex scandal involving a famous Muslim preacher-politician generated rumors that the cleric wanted to have intercourse with a girl who only agreed if he paid for her hymen reconstruction surgery.
The Muslim preacher denied any wrongdoing in the case.
