M

aking a movie about Nyi Roro Kidul, the legendary figure from Javanese tradition, is tough.

The Queen of the South Seas, as she is known, is still feared and revered by those who live on Java'€™s southern coast.

Roro Kidul was famously portrayed by the late sex-bomb Suzanna in a series of schlocky films from the 1980s that continue to entertain audiences in Indonesia and overseas.

Other efforts to bring the queen to the screen have stumbled.

For example, last year'€™s ho-hum horror film Pantai Seletan, about Nyi Blorong, one of Roro Kidul'€™s minions, featured little of interest, save dangdut singer Dewi Perssik writhing in the mud in green spandex.

Now Nayato Fio Nuala is taking on the legend with the Nyi Roro Kidul Project. Unfortunately, the veteran B-movie director can'€™t overcome the limits of an all-too-fast production schedule and an all-too-limited budget.

The story centers around Sandra (Vebby Palwinta), a high school student whose parents are killed in an accident on her 17th birthday.

Sandra is one of those teens still looking for her true identity, as represented by the accessories in her bedroom, featuring posters of Che Guevara and Michael Jordan and a pillow featuring the logo of Italian football club AC Milan.

This is the bedroom of a bonafide confused young girl who can'€™t choose between the socialist Che, the capitalist NBA and the fascist Milan football club.

Vebby, apparently, has been watching too much of the Twillight saga and uses Kristen Stewart a benchmark for the quality of her performances.

While Stewart can only do '€œindifferent'€ expressions, Vebby spends all of her scenes sad or crying. Kudos to Vebby, however: It is not easy for a new actress to cry on camera.

As Sandra spends her days in bed, her aunty, Mia (played by former top Indonesian model Indah Kalalo), steps in to console her.

Take a cue from local soap operas (sinetron), the film has Mia drop an old photo that reveals a dark secret: Sandra was adopted from an orphanage in a little remote village on Java'€™s south coast.

Keen to find her birth parents, Sarah goes on a trip with boyfriend Niko (Randy Pangalila) and friends Gento (Fauzan Nasrul) and Anggun (Raquel Katie Larkin).

Niko is a jock who spends his screen time consoling his despondent girlfriend, while Gento is the group'€™s bumbling joker.

Raquel, it seems, was cast solely to show off the Achenese-American'€™s exotic looks and long legs, as Anggun, her character, does little more than panic in the film.

After the group arrives, the supernatural disturbances begin, in basic B-movie style.

Some scares are riffs on western horror movies such as The Conjuring. Others are obnoxiously telegraphed by the rising musical score.

One of the biggest (albeit inadvertent) laughs that the film garnered at its premiere screening was when a huge studio lamp appeared in shot in one scene that ostensibly took place in a remote jungle at night.

Roro Kidul appears, eventually, dancing like a cute teenager. While Nyato tries to make Roro Kidul look scary, mediocre makeup makes her look like a burn-unit patient deserving our sympathy instead of fear.

Eventually, Sandra accidentally stumbles on a guy named Ernest (Andrew Andika), who does his best to mimic the cool and mysterious aura of Nicholas Saputra, yet like so many elements in the movie, falls flat.

Ernest is a supernatural documentary filmmaker who tells the group that the local residents died mysteriously 15 years ago after failing to properly conduct a human sacrifice for Nyi Roro Kidul.

Since then, their spirits have haunted the place.

A few random terrors later, Sandra and her friends decide to leave and return to Jakarta only to meet a plot twist that would surprise only those who have not seen The Others or The Sixth Sense.

The movie'€™s best performance surprisingly comes from Indah, despite only spending a few minutes on the screen. At the very least, she still manages to look elegant as a sexy aunty for the men in the audience.