Yes, all those bending, twisting, balancing, lifting and inverting maneuvers do something to your muscles, joints, bones and organs, but it is the contemplative aspect of yoga that touches the deeper inner muscles of a person — those of tolerance, courage, love and compassion. I’m talking about meditation.

One of my meditation teachers called this spiritual journey a “revolution”, a journey toward our inner self, the part that is unchanged. It is not always easy, in fact it can be pretty arduous, painful and confusing at times. But in the end, any form of contemplative spiritual practice will awaken the gentle part of you that celebrates happiness in others, making equanimity a more accessible state of mind.

When you have equanimity, even the most powerful anger does not seem to linger long. The Buddhists call this compassionate quality loving kindness.

This came to my attention as I watched and observed sad news of natural disasters that have been rocking the country over the past week.

As a journalist, I had been witness in the past to a host of both manmade and natural disasters, from the string of bombing attacks, the 2004 tsunami to air crashes.

Back then I kept myself detached, as I had to move around to do my job with relative ease.

But since leaving full-time journalism, it has become harder to sit through the news on disasters without being overwhelmed with sadness and the yearning to do something to help the victims.

Of course nothing is wrong with this. After all, our capacity to feel compassion for other beings may be the most redeeming quality about us, the one thing that may help the earth’s survival, just as its opposite has sped up the planet’s decline.

And so we do what we can to help ease the sufferings of others, by donating money, organizing aid, becoming a volunteer or drawing attention to the tragedies.

Being kind goes deeper than meets the eyes, however. It starts from within by regularly kindling the flame of loving kindness or metta in Pali and maitri in Sanskrit. Loving kindness is the quality of goodwill, sympathy and kindness to others. It is love without clinging.

The cultivation of loving kindness (metta bhavana) is a popular form of meditation in Buddhism. But it has been practiced by many non-Buddhists and followers of other beliefs for ages, and its benefits
have been studied in the new field of study on contemplative practices.

A Standford University study suggests that a short 7-minute practice of loving-kindness meditation can increase social connectedness.

Clinical scientists from Duke University also found that loving-kindness meditation has been shown to reduce pain and anger in people with chronic lower back pain.

A researcher at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill found that loving-kindness meditation could help boost positive emotions and well-being in life.

An EEG study also from Stanford University focused on people who do metta meditation with a minimum of 10,000 hours of practice, and showed that compassion meditation could lower the participants reaction to inflammation and distress, both of which are associated with “major depression, heart disease and diabetes”, in response to stressors.

So here I share a simple guide on loving-kindness meditation. It can be practiced before or toward the end of other meditation practice such as vipassana or mindful meditation, or as a standalone practice in itself.

In the beginning, keep it simple and consistent so it becomes easy and not too much effort, but try to keep it sincere and avoid it becoming artificial and mechanical.

Loving-kindness meditation

Start by finding a comfortable place to sit upright, either cross legged on a cushion or on a chair, and allow your body to hang loosely on your spine.

Close your eyes gently and allow your body and breath to soften. Then bring your attention to the area of the heart, see if you can feel your heart and breath together, as if you could breathe into and out of your heart. Feel your breath as if it comes in and out right there at your heart center.

Start by directing loving-kindness toward yourself, because it is hard to fully love others when there are things that you hate or cannot accept in yourself.

Begin to feel compassion for your struggles and sorrows. Try to embrace the sorrow with an open heart and with compassion and loving kindness.  

You can start by saying: “May I be happy and may I be filled with loving kindness”.

Next, think of someone you love, someone for whom you naturally feel compassion, your spouse or partner, your kids or your parents. Try to feel their suffering and struggle and wish also for their happiness.

“May [this person] be happy, and may [they] be filled with loving kindness.”

Then open your heart a little wider to include other loved ones and wish for them the same way. Then open your heart even further to let in all of your friends and the people you love.

“May they all be happy and may they all be filled with loving kindness.

Then try to make your heart even larger, to include everyone you know, whether or not you have special relations with them; then to include someone you are not too crazy about, your enemy.  

Gradually make your heart even larger, large enough to fill the entire house, the entire housing complex, the entire city, the entire country, even the entire planet. Take the whole earth in your heart, and wish all beings happiness and loving kindness.  

“May all beings be happy and may they all be filled with loving-kindness.”

This practice is beautiful because it takes us beyond ourselves and it allows us to extend loving kindness to every sentient being.

Kindness starts from within. Now go out there and manifest this in your everyday actions. Namaste.

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