In this place neon signs blink weakly for no one to see and most of the store signs showing the owners’ forgettable names and contact numbers are left to decay. A bicycle repair store, a car wash, a nail spa and hair salon, a drug store — these kinds of stores. Some of them were now closed, either permanently or just done for the day, while others that were still open emanated a quiet aura, and there wasn’t much there to see or talk about.

The young couple were going to get married at the end of the month and today the man had asked the woman for a walk. They stood before a dilapidated shop with a FOR SALE sign nailed on the shutters. They sat on an empty bench before the empty shop.

“So, here’s this place. I told you that I once stayed at that apartment when I was still in my first year out of university right?” The young man pointed at an old, damp building. “It’s a pity to see the place in this condition right now, but I guess it can’t be helped. Even when I stayed there the building was already decades past its prime. Anyway, this shop used to be a ramen shop that I used to frequent back in those days. It’s closed now, as expected.”

“A ramen shop? In this kind of place?” The young woman looked skeptical.

“Well, this place was completely different from how it is today. The diner’s owner was an old couple who never really said anything to each other. They had very few interactions the whole time I was there, and I visited the place a lot. Not in a bad way, really, but more like… the way you feel very comfortable about somebody beside you that a prolonged silence between you doesn’t make things awkward, you get what I mean? Their ramen was exceptional, though. The broth was savory, the meat was juicy, and the noodles were chewy. No matter how many times I came there, the ramen always maintained the same consistency of deliciousness. And the price was very friendly to me.

There was another thing about the place: it only opened from ten o’clock at night until six o’clock in the morning.”

“A bit unusual indeed.”

The young man nodded. “Exactly. But back then I worked the evening shift, so I had no problem with it. Now, this happened one day when I just came back from work. It was a rough day and all I wanted was to have a nice dinner and went back home to rest. So, I ordered a bowl of my usual order and took a corner seat.

As I was eating, I noticed a woman was looking at me from the opposite table. She was probably in her early thirties. Anyway, our eyes met but I didn’t really pay attention to her. Like I said, I was really tired that day.”

The street lights came on and a group of schoolchildren passed by.

“So what happened?”

“Then the woman walked to my table. ‘Mind if I sit here?’ she asked. I gave her a curt head shake. She didn’t seem to notice and instead took her seat before me. She watched me finish my ramen without saying a word. She only started talking after I put down my chopsticks and wiped my mouth.

‘You’re young and you’re moving away.’ She said it cryptically as a remark, not as a question. And the truth was, I was applying for a job in another town, one that I would later get.

‘Uh-huh.’ I said, feeling a bit in the mood for a conversation now that my stomach was filled, ‘Everybody’s moving from one place to another.’

‘True.’ She nodded and looked at me for a long time. ‘Mind if I tell you a secret?’

‘A secret?’

‘Yes. A story with the right amount of secret.’ She leaned back at the chair and looked outside. ‘Truth is, I am moving away too. And I need someone to tell my story to. Do you want to hear it or not?’

‘Okay,’ I said, ‘But make it quick.’

‘Don’t worry. It’s quite straightforward, actually. So, I killed somebody before.’

‘You killed somebody.’ I repeated, chewing my toothpick.

‘Technically speaking,’ she said slowly, as if reciting lines in a textbook, ‘it was he himself who did it, but I helped him achieve the goal.’

‘Okay,’ I said to her, ‘More context, please.’

Her eyes glistened in the dark. ‘I always believe that sometimes small turns of events can gain momentum that eventually lead to great impacts. Like a gear that shift-kicks things into a jumpstart every once in a while.

At least that’s what I think of why I did it that day. We’ve been going out for about three years, but I felt like it lacked this essential factor that was imperative for a more advanced relationship. So, I decided to break up with him. It was scary, since I felt like it was the only time for me to take control of my life or I had to succumb to this kind of mundane life forever.

It was raining hard when he called me that evening. Of course, I ignored the calls, just like the days before that day, since it was only last month that I ended things between us.

He finally sent me a message. I am dying. Help. I just want to see you one last time.

Intrigued, I went to his place and there I saw him standing on the porch. As soon as he saw me on the gate, he tied a rope that hung from the beam around his neck and kicked the stool under his feet. It was obvious that he set these things up before I got there. On his face was this smug expression that seemed to say, Hey, look at me. See what you’ve done to me.

His plan backfired though. I didn’t feel anything but a burning rage inside me. I walked over to him and kneeled before his hanging body. I stared straight into his eyes, in which panic and apprehension started to materialize.

Help me, he choked, cut this damn rope and get me down.

None of which I did.

I just sat there staring at his dark eyes, the rain thundered loudly around us. But there was no one else around. There was just me and him.

His body jerked violently for a few minutes, and then it stopped.

His eyes were now empty, devoid of life and everything that happened before between us was reduced to a meaningless void.’

‘You left him there?’ my mouth was dry.

‘Yes, nobody knew I was there that night. His mom called me in the morning the next day. She was hysterical.’

‘But why are you telling me all this?’

She stared at me, making me feel nauseous. ‘Tomorrow, I am getting married to a pretty decent guy and I think we will be happy together. But for some reason I know that if I don’t let somebody know about my secret, it will hover over our marriage life like some bad omen. That’s why I am telling you this. And now that you know,’ she rose from her seat and smiled at me, ‘it’s time for me to go. Have a great night.’

And with that she took her exit and vanished into the darkness.”

*

A prolonged silence hovered between the young couple.

“And why are you telling me this?” The woman was shaken.

The man sighed and looked up to the sky, “After that dreadful encounter, every time I look deep into a woman’s eyes for one second too long, the awful, hollow darkness that took place in that woman’s eyes stares back at me; the eyes that had seen the terrible death of a loved one and didn’t do anything about it.

The darkness was so immense and terrible that I have to look away or close my eyes for a while.”

He then looked deep into his partner’s eyes, “You’re the only woman whose eyes don’t reflect that awful darkness when I stare into them. That’s what I love you for.”

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Feliciana Elita Tjokro is an Indonesian writer. Her stories have previously appeared in The Jakarta Post.

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We are looking for contemporary fiction between 1,500 and 2,000 words by established and new authors. Stories must be original and previously unpublished in English. The email for submitting stories is: shortstory@thejakartapost.com

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