H

ope followed by dejection: The never-ending story of the English national soccer team.

England has got nowhere near winning the World Cup for the last 20 years '€” a pitiful showing given that the nation formalized the rules of the game and exported those rules to the rest of the world via the British Empire.

The Three Lions '€” as the England team is more commonly known '€” is programmed to roar, but as it finished bottom of Group D, England'€™s players have exited yet another World Cup with a whimper.

With England gone, the magic of the tournament dimmed for me. So to lift my spirits, I began the search for another World Cup team to support. Who better to ask than my Indonesian soccer-loving friends.

I think I'€™ve had it bad as an England fan, but fans of Indonesia have had it much worse. In the post-independence era, Indonesia has never qualified for the World Cup finals. There was a glimmer of hope in 1938 when the Dutch East Indies (as the Indonesian soccer team was then known) managed to qualify, but it was demolished 0-6 by eventual winners Hungary in the first round.

Indonesia'€™s record in regional competition isn'€™t much better. In Asia'€™s premier international competition '€” the Asian Cup '€” Indonesia has never passed the first round.

Starved of success, soccer-hungry Indonesians are experts in nailing their colors to the masts of other countries '€” preferably ones that can win '€” when international tournaments arrive, so I tried to tap into their expertise.

The search started with an obvious answer, with some people telling me to just back the predicted winner '€” Brazil.

Being the host nation, they said, there was no question that Brazil would win, driven on by the whole country and with superstar players such as Neymar and Oscar.

It was a tempting suggestion. After all, the last (and only) time England had won the World Cup was in 1966 on home soil. But I soon found there was a little more thinking behind the choices of many of my friends.

One friend recommended I support Germany because of the team'€™s fluid, creative game from midfield, driven by the likes of Mezut Ozil and Bastian Schweinsteiger. Logically, it was an excellent suggestion. The Germans always seem to get to the latter stages of these competitions and they have been playing attractive soccer.

But logic and soccer do not always mix. For an Englishman to support Germany in soccer is unthinkable.

The English see the Germans are their great soccer rivals, even if the Germans (annoyingly for the English) do not really seem to reciprocate that rivalry; instead preferring to see their main rivals as the Dutch.

Anyway, Germany was definitely off the list.

Another friend, recently returned from a trip to Western Europe, bought me a souvenir in the form of an orange bottle opener/fridge magnet with the Dutch Republic Lion emblazoned on it.

'€œOK, simple enough,'€ I thought. '€œI'€™ll support the Netherlands.'€ In actual fact, my friend had opted for the Dutch magnet to take a swipe at my club team '€” Manchester City.

With him being a Manchester United supporter and with the new United manager being Dutch, the magnet was a shot over the bows, a warning from my friend that United would reclaim the English Premier League crown from City next season.

Yet another friend said he was supporting the Dutch because they had introduced soccer to Indonesia, but after the orange fridge magnet episode, for me, supporting the Dutch was tantamount to supporting United.

There was no way that was going to happen and there was no way the magnet was going on my fridge.

But the club connection didn'€™t end there. Some friends said they were supporting Uruguay because that country'€™s star player '€” Luis Suarez '€” also played for Liverpool, the team they had supported since they were boys.

Others were supporting Italy because AC Milan was the closest club to their hearts.

So, after much deliberation, I was convinced the club connection was the way to go to revive my World Cup. As the Manchester City squad includes Argentineans such as Sergio Aguero and Pablo Zabaleta, I decided to support Argentina, while conveniently skirting over what this meant for my own patriotism by ignoring the fact that the Falklands War had ever happened.

I need a way out of my World Cup despondency and if Lionel Messi et al can'€™t do it, then no one can.

'€” Mark Wilson