The Jakarta Post
In a 2011 study, the researchers noted that the participant’s body movements, especially their speed and energy and confidence were taken into account when they tried to appear likable. (Shutterstock/File)
As people become more hunched over of their phones and more indifferent to making friends on the internet, we may have forgotten the social habits that make us appear even more likable to others.
No worries though, as there are habits you can acquire that will make anyone like you, according to Time.
Make the person hold a warm item
In a 2008 research paper, 41 students had to hold either hot coffee or iced coffee while they rated a person’s personality trait in a survey.
Sure enough, the students who held the hot coffee scored the person’s “warmth” higher than the students who held the iced coffee.
So the next time a person is on a date, tell them to make their date order something hot.
Speak in high-pitched tone
According to a PloS ONE paper published in 2014, 320 participants had to rate 64 distinct voices which all said the same word – “welcome.” The consistent results showed a pattern which had a majority favoring higher-pitched voices.
It goes without saying that you need to dress well to appear well to others. This assumption was strengthened when a 2011 study made 73 freshmen introduce themselves in front of the other participants who were taking a survey to rate the participant.
Researchers found out that the students who “had a more fashionable appearance” had a higher rating among other students.
Appear energetic and confident
In the same 2011 study, the researchers also noted that the participant’s body movements, especially their speed and energy and confidence were taken into account when they tried to appear likable.
The researchers also said the person’s “originality of content” in their introduction is also a major factor.
Mimic the person you want to befriend
This might seem to annoy the person you are trying to befriend, but there is some scientific basis to this. Another research in 1999, by New York University students, studied the effects of mirroring, also known as copying other person’s actions.
The study focused on two individuals working together; one was a participant while the other worked for the researchers. When the participants were asked to rate each other, the results showed that the partner who mirrored the other was more likable than the partner who were not.
Read also: Here is why you should never go to bed angry
Spend more time with the person
This point is an obvious one, but this can be surprisingly effective even when you never interact with the person.
The University of Pittsburgh conducted an experiment where they had four different women attend a class at different times. When the researchers showed the pictures of the four women and asked the rest of the class who they felt a closer to, the majority of the class pointed towards the woman who attended the most times even though she never interacted with anyone.
So remember that coming to class has its own benefits.
Frequently come in contact with the person
As discussed previously, people tend to think you have a more “warm” personality if you hold something physically warm. Well, your warm hands can also be used for this trick.
A 2007 French study showed that men had a higher chance of making conversations with women if they lightly touch their arms. Another study by the University of Mississippi and Rhodes College showed that the waitresses who lightly touched customers had a noticeable rise in their tips.
Remember to always have a light person-to-person contact, but don’t overdo it.
Read also: 6 things to know about introversion
Some of you may not be inclined to smile and that is perfectly alright. But if you don’t, studies have suggested that people will not like you as much as they would have if you smiled.
The University of Wyoming’s research proved this by showing four distinct pictures to about 100 female undergraduates. The results showed an overall preference to pictures that had a smile in them. A Stanford University study has also shown students having an overall positive feel from a conversation with a big smiling avatar.
It may be annoying to smile, but it works.
Listen to them about themselves
It may be boring to hear someone else’s long-winded speech about themselves; it may even be tiring and lull you to sleep; or it may make you frustrated because you want to talk about something else. However, a study has shown that people feel better talking about themselves.
In the study, participants were put into an MRI with a relative sitting outside. The participants were asked a series of questions. Some were told their answers would be shared with their relatives, while others were told their answers would be kept private. Both results were identical, however. Both groups showed more activity in the brain’s reward-affiliated regions when they were answering questions about themselves.
In short, try not to speak all the time. Listen as well; it’s a skill not many of us can muster. (ezr/kes)