Marietta Ivena was pronounced dead at the age of 33 on July 11 at exactly 11 p.m. in a hospital in Surabaya, East Java, due to COVID-19 complications. She was six months pregnant at the time of her passing. The baby in her womb – later named Celine – did not make it as well.

To say that her unexpected death was a shock would be an understatement. Marietta’s husband, Adi Chandra, 34, said that receiving the call from the hospital that night was the lowest point of his life.   

“All I could do was cry. Our son kept waking up from his sleep and cried,” said Adi, who was still recovering from COVID-19 himself at the time and was in self-quarantine.

The last time Adi saw his wife in person was on July 6 at around 1 a.m. when he brought her to the hospital. Despite having COVID-19 himself, the safety protocols made it impossible for Adi to visit Marietta during her time in the hospital.

A day before her condition worsened, Marietta sent Adi a text message, thanking him for taking care of her and their son. Adi replied and said that he loved her.

“I’m just happy the last message that she read from me was 'I love you',” said Adi, holding back tears.

Marietta was born in Pasuruan, East Java, on Aug. 7, 1987. 

She is survived by her husband and their son Kennard Gladwin Chandra, 7. She also leaves behind her parents, Agus Susanto Teguh, 70, and Nina Lineke, 65, as well as her brother Aditya Saputra, 38, his wife Kwee Meylany, 38, and their children Eugene Saputra, 15, Luigi Saputra, 13, and Gwen Renata, 7.

Her body was cremated on July 12 and Adi planned to scatter her ashes on Sunday — the day after her birthday — in the coastal areas of her birthplace.

Love personified

Adi and Marietta were married on Sept.  29, 2012.

Adi remembers his wife as a generous soul who lifted up others when they were at the lowest points of their lives. Kind-hearted, sociable and empathetic, Marietta would help even those who were not particularly close to her.

“One time, my employee’s mother had fallen in an accident; [Marietta] continued to check up on my employee and asked for updates on his mother,” Adi said.

The bereaved husband also recalled that whenever her friends were in a dark place, Marietta pulled them back into the light. She regularly checked up on her friends

“She was basically their mother figure."

Marietta’s life values inspired Adi and he wanted to continue them after her passing. He named their unborn baby Celine.

“I want the unborn baby to be named so that I can mention her name, too, when I pray for Etta [Marietta’s nickname]. Etta won’t be alone now,” he said.

Friendship never ends

In 2009, Marietta graduated from Parahyangan Catholic University in Bandung, West Java. Her close friends from the international relations study program of the university’s School of Social and Political Sciences included Florencia Purnama Grani Tanidjojo, 33, Ardina Desnita Tinaor, 34, Adisti Maharani Chandra, 33, Tioro Rebecca, 34, and Innike Kusuma Dewi, 34.

The remaining five were still processing the passing of Marietta, whom they described as “the glue” of their friendship.

“Sometimes, when we do a Zoom call, I would automatically do a headcount and realize that there are only five of us left,” Florencia said.

During her time at university, Marietta was widely known as the treasurer of various students associations and event organizations. She was so good with money that she would often take care of the bill first whenever she and her friend group went out to eat. Her friends would pay her back later.

Marietta’s role as a treasurer, however, went beyond bookkeeping and finances. Marietta, as her friends recalled, was the treasurer of their memories.

“She was always the first one to remember our birthdays," Adisti noted and the others nodded. 

Florencia said each friend tended to live in their own bubble from time to time. Marietta regularly reached out first and made sure everybody was in the loop.

“Even now after her death, she brings us together,” said Florencia, adding that they regularly met via Zoom after Marietta’s passing. “From her life to her death, she was the one that brought us all together."

For Adisti, what made Marietta special was her ability to connect with each of her friends by using words they could relate to. As a spiritual person, Adisti recalled that Marietta would give her advice using the word ‘God’. While Ardina, a young mother herself, said Marietta would approach her as a fellow mother and gave her advice in raising her child, who is now 1 year and 4 months old.

“She used language that we could relate to. She was not judgmental and you would feel comfortable talking to her,” Adisti said.

Tioro, who was Marietta’s housemate back in university, remembered that during a very low point in her life, Marietta took her under her wing and introduced her to other friends, which eventually brought the six together.

“She was like a big sister to me,” Tioro said.

For Innike, who lives in Wonogiri, Central Java, the fact that the two came from Chinese-Indonesian families from smaller towns allowed them to share and connect because of their similar backgrounds.

“We would talk about money and hustling. When it came to love life, she would give me advice that was rational and logical,” Innike said.

Marietta’s kindness was felt even by those outside their circle of friends. Ardina said that following Marietta’s passing, she received messages from former university classmates who told her how warm-hearted Marietta was

“I didn’t even know that some of these people knew her [when she was alive],” Ardina said.

Hero

Marietta’s big brother, Aditya, was grateful that he got to spend some time with his little sister as an adult. In addition to their age gap, Aditya also left their hometown after high school for work and, consequently, the siblings were not particularly close during childhood. 

In 2019, Aditya moved to Surabaya and the two families regularly spent weekends together. Aditya’s youngest daughter, Gwen, is the same age as Marietta’s son Kennard.

“The two are like Tom and Jerry,” he said, referring to the old cartoon characters.

Aditya emphasized Marietta’s patience when it came to parenting. He said that not once had Marietta lost her temper — no matter how badly her son behaved. One time, Aditya said he asked Marietta why she did not try to put her foot down every once in a while.

“She simply answered that it was her principle,” he said.

Of Marietta’s passing, Aditya conceded that he was dissatisfied with some of the circumstances during her time at the hospital that led to her passing. In the end, he wanted Marietta to be remembered as a hero.

“I hope that people – especially medical professionals – can learn from her story, so there won’t be more dying in vain like her,” he said.

Popular

Magnitude 6.5 earthquake strikes off Java island: authorities

Philippines to endure extreme heat until mid-May

Indonesia one step from Olympics after beating South Korea