Where do you have in mind? Snow in Europe? Exotic jungle in Peru? Tropical beach in Thailand? Shopping paradise in Singapore? Or being a culture vulture across Indonesia? No matter where you go, Indonesian travelers always have their own trademarks for traveling. It goes beyond fashion; it's from the body language and typical must-have items in their bag you can always tell that they are from . Indonesia!

Adore it or despise it, here are the Ten Commandments for Indonesian Travelers. This observation is made with tongue in cheek, so don't take it too seriously, but watch it carefully!

1. Thou Shalt Carry a Branded Travel Bag

No matter whether it's the real thing or comes from Mangga Dua, at least your handbag, travel bag, or suitcase must flash one of these logos: LV, Guess, Dior or Gucci. Even better if you sport them all, spread evenly across all the above-mentioned items.

2. Thou Shalt Be Proud Wearing Your Own Traditional Textile

Be it a dress, blouse, skirt, or scarf, batik fashion is a must-wear these days -if you travel overseas, it's mandatory - whether out of nationalism or simply following the crowd.

3. Thou Shalt Cover Your Body With Pashmina Whatever the Weather

Whether you are in chilly Italy or sunny Bali, you can wear a worn-out sun dress or sleeping t-shirt, but don't forget to drape yourself in a flowy pashmina to protect your skin from the sunlight and your body from masuk angin while simultaneously giving your look some extra cosmopolitan oomph.

4. Thou Shalt Wear Sunglasses All Over Your Face or Above Your Head

If you're ABG (anak baru gede: youngster), choose faceglasses instead of eyeglasses, the bigger the better! If you're a Madame, just use sunglasses to accessorize your hair as a hair band, the blinger the better!

5. Thou Shalt Not Forget To Update Your Facebook Status Regularly and Chat on Your Blackberry

Let every member of your online social circle know where you are and what you are up to. Upload photos religiously and don't lose contact with your friends. You can see your destination later by buying the local postcards; most importantly is to pay attention to your gadget first!

6. Thou Shalt Take Pictures Everywhere You Go

At the airport, waiting for the plane, during takeoff, while sleeping miserably, during the plane meal time, during landing, as you step into the new country, when you find your bed in your hotel, while bargaining for souvenirs at some touristy place . never ever forget to take pictures! Do it with a cheeky grin with a peace sign, or just stand straight with a forced smile.

7. Thou Shalt Not Forget to Sleep

It is important to sleep while you're traveling, and be brave enough to flaunt yourself with your mouth wide open or your body in the most unflattering sliding pose. And even though you sleep more than 12 hours during the flight, you still have full rights to sleep another 12 hours immediately after arriving at your destination.

8. Thou Shalt Prepare *Sambal Botol' and *Minyak Angin' For Emergency Situations

When your tongue just can't handle the strange taste of that strange food, just splatter on that sambal botol (bottled chili sauce), and when you experience any kind of carsickness, air sickness and sea sickness, just snort up that bottle of minyak angin (essential oil) as first aid.

9. Thou Shalt Wear a Boxy Jacket Against the Wind Chill

Gentlemen, if your finances or your sense of style won't reach a Zara-type of stylish jacket, then any boxy bomber jacket, even one that comes from your company gathering as a free souvenir, will do to protect your body from the chilly wind and too much exposure of your fashion don'ts.

10. Thou Shalt Run As Fast As You Can When You Hear the Boarding Announcement, But Walk As Slowly As Possible Once You Pass The Entrance

It is important to be the first person passing the entrance when your flight is boarding, but once you're in, you can take as much time as you like to stroll and sashay down that runway to the plane, no need to worry about the people walking behind you.

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your chief style attendant speaking. On behalf of the entire crew, I would like to welcome you aboard the new decade. The fasten seatbelt sign has been switched on, please fasten your seat belt and make sure you'll only fall asleep gracefully in full upright position. Stow your fake branded luggage under the seat in front of you or trash it in our rubbish bin. Any BlackBerry must be turned off during your trip at all times and the use of sunglasses only allowed when the sun is shining.

"We remind you chili sauce will ruin your new culinary experience and the peace sign is prohibited by a new photography law applying to the entire destination. You will find all travel fashion don'ts information in the card located in the seat pocket in front of you. Please walk at a normal speed after landing when you reaching the terminal building. Thank you and I wish you a pleasant new year."

- DIAZ http://whoisdiaz.com

Popular

Why Indonesia must write ASEAN’s green rules

Freeport Indonesia pushes back full copper mine restart

Growth without gain: Why Indonesians don't feel the economy