Failure is inevitable on the road to success. It is a part of success – a great part even.

Dealing with failure is not an easy thing to do.

I myself have a hard time getting my confidence back after experiencing failure. But, we can always try to be better and we can always make better choices when dealing with failure. Let me tell you how.

Admit that you are wrong

Throw your ego into the trash can and swallow your pride. It is good to humbly admit that you are wrong and that you have failed. I know it feels bitter, but it is the most basic step for dealing with failure.

Admitting that you are wrong is much easier to do than arguing about or defending your wrongdoings. No matter how right you are, you cannot deny the fact that there is failure there, and the fact that you are responsible for that.

Sincerely apologize

Well, many people are so full of ego and pride that it is hard for them to apologize. Apologizing, especially for our own faults, is a thing that only mature and wise people do. So, have a quick check of yourself. If you still have a hard time apologizing, then maybe you are still a baby.

Apologizing is vital for dealing with failure. You know you have failed and disappointed someone, so apologizing will help you restore the broken relationship. Once again, throw your ego and pride into the trash can, so you can apologize sincerely – apologizing will be useless if you are still holding a grudge or hatred.

Forgive yourself

The next step is forgiving yourself. I know it is hard to forgive yourself, and especially when you know that you have failed. Forgiving yourself can be a huge help in allowing yourself to move forward. I know it can take some time, but it will also get easier over time.

When I receive a reprimand, I feel traumatized by that and I can’t move on. I keep blaming myself and telling myself that I am a failure. That I have failed big time. This can be negative for me and I know this, but often I feel I just cannot move forward.

But, in the end, I always forgive myself knowing that I am still learning and that I can always improve my work in the future.

Talk to a friend

For me personally, talking with friends helps me a lot in dealing with almost anything. Sometimes the pain is so great that it feels unbearable and I cry for hours. During these times, I really need someone to talk to, basically anyone who will listen.

Talking with a friend lifts away all the pain I have and leaves me with an inner-peace I cannot describe. It also gives me the solutions I need.

Many times I find my friends really helpful and wise, able to offer many insights. They provide me with perspectives that I often overlook.

Learn from your mistake

A reprimand will be useless if you do not learn from it. It should act as your tool for improving yourself and doing better in the future. Learning from it, or at least from your mistake, is crucial.

Mistakes are things that we should not repeat in the future, so let us simply take them as a reminder.

Making mistakes is normal and acceptable and a part of learning. But, not learning from them is unacceptable. So, learning from mistakes is a must if you want to grow.

Embrace the failure

Embracing failure is hard, but this is the step that you need to take in order to be fully free. It simply means that you are finally OK with things and that you understand that it happens to everyone.

Embracing failure means that you are finally at peace with yourself; that you do not blame yourself, but rather forgive yourself.

Move on and do better

So, this is the last step, ladies and gentlemen. After all of those steps, moving on is the ultimate step in dealing with failure.

We should not let failures take over our lives and mess with our present glory. We should leave failures behind and do better the next time around.

Moving on and doing better are the two things we should do for our own sake – to make ourselves happier and more peaceful.

Finally, promising ourselves that we will be and do better is a wise step to consider, and will hopefully mean less failure in the future.

My final word is that we should embrace and befriend our failures, as they will provide for us the lessons we need. Good luck!

***

Nur Millah Mutsliah is currently studying English Education at UIN Jakarta. Her interests include reading, writing, and listening to music.

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