During the past three weeks that I have been in Jakarta, I have been experiencing “gender shock”. In this city that never sleeps, I feel old, disrespected and disposable as a childless woman in my early 40s. In addition to my “Caucasian” body frame of 172.5 centimeters in height or 181.5 cm in heels, it is hard for me to “blend in” among Indonesians whose average height is 150- to around 160 cm.

In the US, I felt so alive. Yes, “life begins at 40” and 40-something women in my home state of California are no less physically or intellectually attractive when compared to their 20 to 30-year-old sisters. Also, though your experiences do matter, age is not a hindrance when applying for a job as the law protects you.

Drop-dead gorgeous women in their 40s in Hollywood include actresses Lucy Liu, Jennifer Aniston, Julianne Moore, Halle Berry and Salma Hayek. Drop-d...