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'Motherhood': Celebrating the pursuit of nontraditional gendered roles
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(Stock illustration of a woman with a baby) As the world moves toward becoming more gender fluid, conventional gendered roles are also being redefined. (Unsplash/Zach Lucero) (Unsplash/Zach Lucero)
A
s the nation celebrates Women’s Day on Dec. 22 to recognize their contribution to the independence movement and national development, three people share their experience and thoughts on the true meaning of "motherhood".
Koming, a 41-year-old mother of two daughters aged 15 and 13 who lives in Denpasar, Bali, does not remember the last time she and her two daughters celebrated Women’s Day on Dec. 22.
“I can’t remember, to be honest,” said Koming, who asked to use only her given name.
She and her daughters used to mark the date by having a “special lunch or dinner, but now that we’re too far away from each other, it’s just another day [and] I’m not into celebrating anything, actually”, she explained.
Koming’s daughters have lived with their father since 2018 in Klagenfurt, Austria, after the couple separated in 2010 and mutually agreed to be co-parents. Ultimately, Koming agreed that their daughters should live in Austria to get a better education and greater opportunities to explore the world.
Koming maintains her relationship with her daughters by communicating with them via WhatsApp and Zoom. Although she does not talk to them every day, she makes sure her daughters know they can always reach out to her, regardless of the time difference.
“I always remind my daughters that I’m always there for them,” she said, while acknowledging that this arrangement might raise eyebrows from other women, especially in Indonesia.
