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Giulia, Jyoti, and Maya: Victims, victors and healers

In a world fraught with conflict, and not just in war, the only way to eliminate gender-based violence is by destroying the patriarchy.

Julia Suryakusuma (The Jakarta Post)
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Jakarta
Wed, November 29, 2023

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Giulia, Jyoti, and Maya:  Victims, victors and healers Activists from a women's anti-violence movement hold a banner reading “Eradicate sexual violence? There must be a way!” during a protest against sexual harassment and violence against women on campuses, outside the Education and Culture Ministry in Jakarta on Feb. 10, 2020. (AFP/Adek Berry)

W

henever I am introduced to an Italian, my opening gambit is “I became a woman in Italy”. It sounds a bit titillating, but it only means I was there from the age of 13 to 16, a period normally associated with coming of age.

In Rome, where my parents were posted at the Indonesian Embassy, my growing awareness of being a budding young woman was heightened by so much male attention. Wanted or unwanted, I figured, there are worse places to become a woman!

However, a few days ago I read about huge demonstrations all across Italy on Saturday, related to the murder of a woman by her ex-boyfriend. Wow, this is so far removed from my experience in Rome, when cat-calls or wolf whistles, a daily part of my life in the Italian capital, were annoying but harmless.

Giulia Cecchettin, a 22-year-old university student, just about to graduate, was allegedly killed by her ex-boyfriend, Filippo Turetta, 22. He had refused her decision to end their relationship and also resented the fact that she had completed her degree in biochemical engineering at the University of Padua before he did. Okay, so it’s a blow to his male ego, but murder? Seriously?

The slaying of Giulia triggered rage and grief, mobilizing an estimated 50,000 people who protested all across Italy – in Milan and Naples, creating gridlock in Rome.

While Italy is definitely not Afghanistan, the Democratic Republic of the Congo or Somalia – three of the worst countries for women – according to the Italian Ministry of the Interior, 106 women have been killed this year, more than half (55) allegedly by a partner or former partner.

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The nationwide protest in Italy reminded me of similar protests in India in 2012, following the horrendously brutal gang rape and murder of Jyoti Singh, a 23-year-old medical student. The public outrage caused the Indian government to adopt legal reforms, but they remained largely on paper.

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